What an immense emotion it is to feel loneliness and rejection. When I was 4 years old my mother kicked my dad out because of a deep alcoholism problem. He then came in and out of my life from time to time mostly when he was living in sober living house. However he spent most of my childhood on the streets of Los Angeles. This lead me to develop the notion that I wasn’t enough for a male figure to stick around. I’ve experienced that pain over and over. That’s my story. Here is how I deal with this energy and also help my clients in my Mind Body Healing practice.
How to get on the other side of pain, fear, rejection or abandonment.
1. First you must fully welcome this pain. Do not deny, hide or push this pain away. “What we resist, persists.” The avoidance of this emotion is what will keep it stagnant in your body and consciousness. Let it come up and flow through you. Watch it, witness it and look at it as though it’s a movie. Remember, it will not last forever, it’s only energy moving through. It’s bringing awareness and acceptance of these feelings that allows it to move.
2. As feel into these emotions, put your hands on the parts of your body you feel the most energy. For me it was my heart and stomach. Be present and loving as you place your hands on those places. Repeat to yourself the mantras that are the opposite of what you are feeling. I felt alone, rejected and unlovable. So I repeated to myself: I am here. I am enough. I am safe. I am loved. Give yourself that which you feel you are lacking. See how this shifts everything.
After doing this myself and with my clients, I and many others sit on the other side of this pain. l find my self in deep gratitude. Instead of blaming and reaching for love through another, I now give this energy to myself. Because really, that’s what is being asked of us when we feel this way.
These moments give us the opportunity connect with ourselves more deeply so that we are fulfilled and our fulfillment depends only on our relationship with yourself.
To learn more about Monica or her Mind Body Healing work go to monicaloren.com